Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Deliverance, not of the banjo kind...

....but of the spiritual bondage kind...

Sunday in church, we declared it Healing Sunday. I wish I had a nickel for everyone who told me that I needed to be sure to be in the prayer line to be prayed for regarding the MS that keeps attacking my body. Not so. I needed to be there for another reason altogether.

For months now, whether it be the start of menopause, the stress of my job, symptoms of MS, the addition and subtraction of different medications and their side effects or just the change in the weather, I have been a ticking time bomb just waiting to explode. Big time. In fact, I'm convinced that it was none of the above which caused me to go off in a rant every other day (or every other minute on some days!), but I do believe that the enemy had oppressed me with a spirit of anger.

I was lashing out at Brillo Man or Olivia for no reason other than stupid things like "I can't find my layway slip!!!" The enemy was winning. I was losing.

So, on Sunday morning, I decided that I had had enough. I don't know if any of you know that the original root for 'healing' in the Bible encompasses not only a physical healing, but salvation and deliverance as well. Bingo. Deliverance. I wanted it - and I wanted it now.

I stood in line --for a very long time --in physical pain from my knees and MS junk --many times wanting to sit down -- but knowing that this was God's appointed time for I pressed on.

When it was my turn, Pastor Kent and the prayer team annointed me with oil and began to pray. Honestly, I have no idea what they prayed because I was transformed in my mind to another place --being blessed beyond belief --praying in my heavenly language --expecting a miracle!

...After church, it is customary for the people greeting at the door to offer a sweet treat. There is always someone standing with a huge basket of dum-dum lollipops and it is Olivia's chance to pick through until she finds the coveted grape one.

Lollipop in hand, it's time to don the winter gear and head out into the cold...."Olivia, please be responsible for your lollipop. Put in in the bag so that you don't drop it in the snow when we go outside." "Okay, Mom."

Upon entering the van, Olivia suddenly cries out, "Mom! My lollipop! I dropped my lollipop!" I calmly replied, "Why were you carrying your lollipop when I asked you to put it in the bag?" At which point, my sweet, cherub daughter transformed into this raging child..."I NEED TO GO BACK INSIDE AND GET ANOTHER LOLLIPOP! YOU NEED TO GO WITH ME TO GET ANOTHER LOLLIPOP!" ...still remaining calm, "Olivia, we're not going back to get another lollipop, I have to get home to get some sleep." ( I had worked the night before and needed to return to work that night and hadn't yet slept and it was already 2 pm as church had gone way over time.) By now, Olivia is not just screaming but had gotten out of the van and was kicking and punching my door, screaming that she hates me at the top of her lungs and pretty much causing the disturbance of a lifetime. Olivia? no. ...the enemy using her to push my buttons. yes. But guess what? I had just been prayed for to be delivered from a spirit of anger.

Ha! Satan - you're defeated! I very calmly got out of the van, walked over to Olivia, took her by the hand and led her to the van door where I asked her, ever so nicely to please get in. Normally, I'd be screaming at her and stating that there would soon be consequences for her actions if she didn't shape up. Especially since I was exhausted after having been awake all night. My fits of rage were always worse when I was tired. But this time, not a word from my mouth. She got in the van and continued to scream as we drove away --all eyes of all the folks in the parking lot on us. I turned on the radio and began to quietly sing along to a Christmas carol. Olivia screamed some more. Louder. (Which I didn't think was possible since I was sure she had achieved the maximum decibel level possible for a six year old!)

I continued to sing. And then I looked at her in the rear view mirror and smiled and said, "Olivia, you better be careful, with all that crying and carrying on you're doing, your face is going to crack." Then - a smile. And soon a giggle. And what a pleasant ride we had the remainder of the way home.

Today - a trip to StuffMart --where again, I was tempted to lose control as Olivia started behaving in ways that were completely not becoming a happy six-year old. Again - I remained calm.

Coincidence? Nope. Miracle? Yes.
With God, I am victorious. The enemy will just have to stuff it and go bug somebody else. I feel a change coming...and it ain't menopause!

Her she is - the cherub -
before church and the dreaded "lollipop incident"
looking all cute in the new dress that Grandma bought her!

But as soon as they were at rest,
they again did what was evil in your sight.
Then you abandoned them to the hand of their enemies
so that they ruled over them.
And when they cried out to you again,
you heard from heaven,
and in your compassion
you delivered them time after time.
-Nehemiah 9:28


Ladyfromthewoods said...

What a wonderful account of the victory that we have in Christ! What an honest account of your Sunday morning and how Satan seeks to steal our peace, gradually, sneakingly, serpent-like, and how when we drag it into the light it will not stand but slink back.
Said a special prayer for you just now. I hope you feel His prescence and continue to shout His glory for others to hear.

Mrs. Mac said...

Victory over anger ... YEAH! That is a very good victory ... especially for a parent of a screaming six year old minus a dum dum. Good going! Praying for you now that you maintain your God anointed collectedness. Hugs,

Jada's Gigi said...

Awesome testimony! Boy, do I know what those tantrums are like! lol

Becky said...

i think i'm under the same attack! i now need to go study these particutars. thanks.

Constance said...

That sure sounds ike satan's tactics doens't it? I remember after the Lord had delivered me from the anger, bitterness and resentment that I had felt towards my bio father for much of my life. I felt free and whole for the first time ever! I was walking on the clouds! I had overcome!

Flash forward one month. I was talikng to my bio father on the phone who asked me to thank our daughter for her thoughtfulness in sending him a letter. Right then and there, satan jumped on me with twisted toughts.

"Isn't that nice, all of the years you've done stuff for him, desparate to have some kind of a relationship with him and he gets all connected with your daughter for one stupid letter!"

He was just waiting for the right time to snatch back my healing and deliverance. I knew that this was one of those crossroads-faith-testing "opportunities".

With everything I could muster, pushing my own self down I praised God and said,
"How wonderful that my daughter will never know the rejection I have felt from this man!"

It was literally instantaneous that I felt satan's presence leave! I have NEVER been plagued by those thoughts since and it's been 7 years!

When God gives us a victory, HE intends us to hang on to it and not just let someone come and take it away from us!


Margie said...

i love this post! sometimes people think we need healing from one thing, but in our heart, we know.

It's awesome when God works in our hearts!!!

Constance said...

Hey Deb!

If you can do those 7 random things in just 7 spare minutes, I will be totally impressed!


dawna said...

I knew it would happen. You have been asking with your heart. The place God listens to very closely. I am so happy for you dear friend. Your living room looks nice..mmmm. Hugs and smiles. And peace.

Felisol said...

Hello Deb,
this was a post that made me think, and hopefully get a bit wiser.
I have experienced healing, and also the feeling of the miracle dripping away.
Remain in me and I will remain in you, was the words that came to me while reading about your church experience.
The old fiend comes just now reminding me about all the times I have mismanaged and faltered, after being wonderfully helped by God.
His grace is new every day, I answer. As long as God doesn't give up on me, I shall remain in him.
From Felisol

KayMac said...