Sunday, January 21, 2007

God's Hug

Today I have been hurting.

My best friend, Dawna, has made a decision to attend another church --for many reasons which I'm unable to discuss.

We were on the Praise Team together and one of our most favorite things to do together is sing and worship the Lord in beautiful harmony. I have been feeling so sad, knowing that we will no longer be singing together. In fact, my sadness was so deep that this morning I stayed home from church --not knowing how I could possibly lead the congregation in worship whenever I knew I would be blubbering all over the place --missing my friend. (Also, it didn't help that I fell yesterday and really was hurting physically this morning as well. Normally, I would've pushed through the physical pain and been in church. Today --it was a good excuse to stay home and wallow in my self-pity.)

Tonight, I decided to fix my hair, put on some makeup to hide my nose - red from crying and haul my sorry self to church. The teens took their turn this evening at leading worship and I sat back to relax and enjoy God's presence. My mind began wandering...thinking about how things are going to change drastically for our praise team because Dawna lent such a strong vocal presence. She has one of the most beautiful, angelic voices I have ever heard with the ability to pull a second line of harmony out of nowhere and make anything we sing sound fabulous --what I like to think was a sweet, sweet sound to our Lord.

Just as the tears began to roll down my cheeks, the teens started to sing this song --one that I haven't ever heard them choose to use while leading worship --but something, or Someone caused them to sing it tonight --and oh, how it ministered to my spirit.

Dawna, I am going to miss you SO much in church but I know that God is working in ways we can not see --in both of our situations --and I know that He will get the glory in the end. He always does!


Sara said...

i'll be praying for and loving both of you from michigan.

Pat said...

You know I am always praying for both of you. I miss Dawna too, I loved reading her blogs, tell her when she's up to it, please start blogging again.
Your both so blessed to have each others friendship, that's a continual hug from the Lord.
I haven't heard that song for was so good to have it playing in my heart again.
Love you both!

Margie said...

I'll be praying!! loveyou

Marla Bean said...

Hi Deb. While I wouldn't venture to say I know how you're feeling - a similar situation happened to me and my friend. She left our church for an opporunity that was perfect for her. I will admit that our friendship changed, but it's not gone. We only live about 30 miles apart from each other, but we find it difficult to see each other a lot since we're both so involved in our church. It reminded me of when a good friend moves out of state. I know you mourn for the loss, but you're right - God has a bigger plan, always. I'm sorry!

dawnaj1958 said...

Dear Friend, No more tears. Please. I just need to rest. To be still and hear Him, not lead. I know you understand. I also miss everyone here, but am at such a crossroads of my life that I am stalled. Hopefully stepping down from leadership and becoming part of the crowd will allow me to heal. I miss and love you all...hugs. God is opening the way for me to heal and it is a road I simply must take...

Jada's Gigi said...

Hey the comment I left yesterday is gone! Well I said something liek "we all miss Dawna, of course not like will be hard I know but she has to do what she has to do...but you know that...:)
praying for you both...

tina fabulous said...

i'm once again very behind w/ everyone's blogs.

i know how you feel here. when my best friend left and turned me into a solo act, i thought i'd be miserable for the remainder of my days. but, 3 years later, i can see that it was all for the good.

but, in the meantime, you'll so totally be in my prayers. :)