Letting Go

A view of Randy's hometown woodlands
Last evening, I was typing while my dear husband dictated his autobiography. (A requirement by the agency before we can become foster parents.) When Randy got to the place in his life where his Dad sold 346 acres of his farm, I cried right along with him as he retold the story:

"...The thing that changed my life the most out of any other event was the day our neighbor came to visit. He owned the adjacent farm and just happened to stop by at the one vulnerable time most perfect for his cause. My Dad, who was once again laid-off, although this was the final time he was laid-off, nonetheless was out of money so we sold off all but four acres, the house and the barn.

I spent the next thirty years angry and hurt in a delusional quest more subliminally driven than thought, but a quest nonetheless to 'buy back' the land I’d loved so dearly..."

Randy was a teen when this life-changing event occurred. No longer would he have the freedom to roam the land, or the space to raise his animals. But it was more than that --he had to let go of a dream that day. I know that in his heart, he would love to own the land that his father once owned.

After listening to my husband talk last night, I understand so much better why he spends hours on his John Deere tractor, digging holes and planting trees on our 14 acre property. I believe that a part of him, whether he would admit to it or not, is trying to recreate that woodland farm of his youth. In his mind he may be trying to go back to the simplier days before he was responsible for caring for a family and earning the money to pay the bills. When life was less complicated. When his biggest concern was perhaps whether he would have a good day selling eggs from his chickens, or if he would be able to put back together whatever small piece of machinery he had chosen to take apart.

We hold on to many things in life and as we get older, I think that the realization of all the "letting go" that we've had to do is more difficult than the actual "letting go" itself. You know that saying, "You don't know what you have until it's gone." May we appreciate and cherish each person, each home, each thing with which the Lord has blessed us. For we never know when someone will sell the farm.

In the days of her affliction and wandering Jerusalem remembers all the treasures that were hers in days of old. When her people fell into enemy hands, there was no one to help her. Her enemies looked at her and laughed at her destruction. - Lamentations 1:7

Post Script: There seems to be a similar theme running today:
Read Sara's Blog.

Pause for Praise

photo copyright Deborah Erskine 2006
Seven times a day and all day long do I praise You because of Your righteous decrees. --Psalm 119:164

I have been reading a book which I have borrowed from my dear friend, Dawna. The book is by one of my favorite authors and teachers, Joyce Meyer.

In The Battle Belongs to the Lord, Joyce encourages us to take a praise pause. I don't think that there's anything that blesses the Lord more than when we stop right in the middle of whatever it is we're doing and worship Him. When pausing to praise, we remind ourselves that apart from Him we can do nothing (John 15:5), and express our total dependence upon the Lord. In turn, He blesses us. We are de-stressed and re-energized. Our focus changes from us to Him. As our perspective changes, often times He reveals to us another way of accomplishing our task which, in the end, is so much more efficient or beneficial.

Don't forget to praise Him today!

Five Things I've Always Wanted to Ask....

Would you be happier living in Europe or India or one of those countries where you wouldn't have to shave your underarms and legs every five minutes?

Have you ever picked your nose and wiped it somewhere other than a kleenex? (Or tissue for you 'purists' reading this post.)

Do have have a "secret stash" of junk food and snacks hidden in your house?

Do you take off your bra the second you walk in the door?

Do you get some kind of sick satisfaction out of popping zits?

By the way....don't think for a moment that ANY of the above questions are asked based on personal experience or desire....However, remind me to tell you about the time, as a Fine Arts major in college (before I changed my major to Medical Technology as a Junior and had to start ALL OVER AGAIN because NOTHING transfers from Art to Med. Tech)....that I actually considered creating an "Art Happening" where one could walk into a room and the walls would all be completely covered in fake zits for you to pop).

I'm going to end this post now before I chicken out and hit the "delete" key. I'm thinking that this is NOT the "insight into my life" that birminghamgirl wants to know when she asked us to tell a little more about ourselves....

Monkey Business

Especially for Sara.

Preschool!

Today was Olivia's first day of preschool.

We woke up early, got dressed, took a couple of photos and dashed out the door. No time for breakfast. (Terrible, I know...but she won't eat first thing in the morning anyway...) She gets a snack mid-morning --she should be fine...

Olivia was excited! Mommy was nervous.

All the other children are "old pros" at this because school started two weeks ago. We only learned of this opportunity last Friday....so Olivia got a late start.

How would she do?

Would she make new friends?

Would she listen to her teachers, Miss Lydia and Mrs. Forbes?

I walked into the Kids of the Kingdom Preschool held at the Presbyterian Church in town. All the other children were arriving --many dressed in their finest because today is school picture day.

We hung her jacket on the hook, and then Miss Lydia takes Olivia's hand and leads her into one of the playrooms where she will place her backpack and commence playing for the first 30 minutes.

Olivia marches right off with Miss Lydia while I stand there with this empty, gnawing feeling in the the pit of my stomach, realizing that my baby girl is growing up and is no longer a baby. For the first time in her life, I'm not going to be privy to everything Olivia does. I'm not going to be able to see how she conducts herself; if she plays 'fair' if the class bully pushes her on the ground, if she eats her snack, if she cooperates with her teachers, if she pays attention during story time, if she recites her Bible verse, if the other kids like her.

I walked out the door of the church and did what I vowed I wasn't going to do - I started to get all choked up and teary eyed. (Those who know me and are reading this are saying, "surprise...surprise!...Deb's getting all emotional!)

After I collected myself, I began my list of errands --to the post office to mail an eBay package, to the bank to deposit a check, to the mission thrift shop to see what kind of great bargains I can find, to the library to return some books....and the best part was I had my camera with me. I took some time in between all those stops to get some great "art" photographs of our town.

The thrift shop was having an "everything you can fit in a bag is two bucks" sale. Yeah! I kept checking my watch every five minutes...oh no, no time to go to the library...got to go get Olivia.

I drove back to the church. No other parents were there. How odd. I sat there for a few minutes before I realized that preschool doesn't end at 11am but 11:30am...(duh)...okay - time for the library after all. I made one of the quickest "runs" through the library picking out several books for Olivia. Then I jumped back in the van and headed over to the church - again. Still no one in the parking lot....I sat there a few minutes and finally other parents began to show up.

We walked in and stood in the foyer area and waited for the kids to be allowed to leave --one at a time. I did take note that most of the other Moms were VERY young and most of the Grandmothers were closer to my age! I was feeling a tad old!

Finally, Olivia came bursting out of one of the rooms, backpack in hand. I gave her a hug and kiss, told her that I missed her and she said, "yeah, okay Mom, let's get going because I'm kinda hungry." When I opened the van door, there on her booster seat was a doll that I had managed to fit in my "everything I could fit in a bag for two bucks". Olivia was excited for about two seconds then said, "Mom, we really need to stop at McDonalds for a burger."

On the drive to McDonalds, I asked her about her morning...wanting to know every detail. It was like "pulling teeth" trying to get information out of her.

I’ve been asking her off and on all day....”Olivia, tell me about your day at preschool.” Her reply, “Mom, I just can’t really remember everything that I did and I really would just like to watch a video”, ...or “read a book”, ...or “have a snack”, ...or “work on an art project”.

A little later my Mom called to find out how Olivia did at her first day of preschool. As soon as Olivia discovered who I was talking to, she grabbed the phone and said, “Grandma! I have to tell you all about school!”...

Ugh. My baby is growing up.

Illustration Friday: Quiet

A simple pencil sketch for this week's Illustration Friday theme: Quiet
There's something quite peaceful about enjoying a cup of tea with lemon. Enjoy!

Money!!!

If I suddenly became a millionaire (not that it's going to ever happen, but it's nice to dream), first --I would give a ton of money to the Lord. Then I'd probably tell my DH to buy the grass carp that he wants to buy for the pond so that they will eat down some of the weeds. (The fish cost around $700 --not a price we can afford today.) Then, of course, I'd pay all my debts and our families' debts. Then I might hire a landscaper to come and plant some really BIG, mature trees on our property in the space where there are no trees. And then I'd live off the rest of the money and relax and live life.

I would not go out and buy a boat, a plane, a summer home or a cabin in the mountains. I might splurge for a new washer and dryer --and a new handle fixture thingy for the kitchen window which has been broken for almost a year now.

The best thing I would be able to do --and would want to do would be to give back to the Lord and to help my relatives. The rest is gravy.

I think by writing this little essay that I've proven to the Lord that by Him blessing me with scads of money, I would not turn into a money-hungry, greedy, beady-eyed weasel. Therefore, I think He should open up those windows of heaven and pour out that blessing - in the form of money, of course, What do you think?

take just a minute....

For all of us who think we're too busy to take a moment for the Lord....listen to the song and take just one minute to be with Jesus.

God bless you all!

Twenty Questions...aka 20Q

Here's my good news of the day (for me, anyway). I am DONE, as in FINISHED, with my Christmas shopping for the year! (and the crowd roars!).

I greatly dislike shopping when the stores are crowded. You will never see me doing my shopping the week before Christmas. How in the world some of you wait until Christmas Eve to shop is beyond me! Most would argue that is when the best sales occur. No sale is worth the pressure of dashing through a mall, knowing it's about to close and I still haven't picked out the perfect gift for my teenage nephew. (Who, by the way, is IMPOSSIBLE to buy for!) (I know, I ended that sentence in a preposition --can't help it --it's late and I don't have the brain power to think of how best to reword it....) Moving right along...

My nephew. I can't buy him clothes because every time I've done that in the past he tells me that he won't wear whatever it was that I bought him. I won't buy him music - because I don't appreciate the music which he insists is good. Video games? I can't keep up with which ones he already owns. Books? He's not a reader.

Last evening, when I was finishing up my Christmas shopping, I discovered this great 'thing' in StuffMart. The PERFECT gift for my nephew! I'ts called 20Q. It claims it can read my mind - it will guess my thoughts. Ha. Right. It states "Try Me!" in big letters on the package. So I stood in the aisle at StuffMart and took it up on its challenge. Basically, it's an electronic game of twenty questions. You think of something, it asks you questions about that something. You punch in your answer of 'unknown', 'no','yes', or 'sometimes'. It attempts to guess what you're thinking.

My first thought: Elephant. Well --it guessed it in 20 questions. Then I thought, "Well, that was too easy.", so I tried: Owl. Again - guessed in 20 questions. I thought, 'okay - let's get real here' - and I chose a more difficult object: Tape. It took 24 questions! Yeah --a victory for me --no --it still flashed "I WIN" --because it did guess the object that I was thinking. I give up --let me continue my shopping and deal with this at home! I tossed two in the cart - one for my nephew and another for someone else --maybe my niece --maybe my stepdaughter. It's undecided at this time.

Anyway - flash to home: As I unloaded my bounty from the van and hid things around the house this evening to keep them safe from the eyes of a four-year-old, I took the 20Q game out and tried to stump it again.
Bubbles. It guessed it.
Cards. Got it.
Let me get REALLY tricky...
Christmas Tree. It got it again!
I’m thinking that there’s no way to stump this toy.

It’s obviously a space alien in disguise.

Go buy it for all the teenagers in your life. I’m going to buy another one for my nephew because this one will be worn out long before Christmas!

Steady Rain

steady rain

i hear it on the roof

on the skylights

gently drumming

calming

soothing

washing

bringing renewal

the dust and dirt gone

returning to the ground

under my feet

where it belongs

Spirit's Rain

let It pour

over my heart

washing clean

sometimes softly

sometimes harder

always cleansing

removing the dust and dirt

it's on the ground

where it belongs

under my feet


-deborah erskine
9-27-06

Because I Said So!

I've become my mother.

Olivia asked me to fix her some lunch. She told me what she wanted. I fixed it for her. She ate one bite and then asked for something else. I fixed it for her. She ate one bite and asked for something else. At which point, I told her that I wasn't going to keep making food for her only to take one bite and request something else.

She proceeded to cajole and beg and lament for something else to eat. I then told her that she better just go eat what she had originally requested because there are a lot of starving children all over this world who don't have anything to eat and we can't waste the food.

When she asked me why there were starving children all over the world, I launched into this long explanation about all the atrocities that occur on our planet which directly or indirectly cause children to starve. (All explained on a four-year-old level, of course.) After which, Olivia kept repeating, "But why, Mom?...why does that happen?...why?"

Finally, I became so exasperated that I said, "Because I said so, that's why!"

Sheesh! I told myself that I would never 'become my mother'...I think it's destiny.

I give up. I think I'll go order this mug...

Rain

It's raining.

No. It's pouring.

I have to get ready for church and then get my daughter up and get her ready for church. I hate going to church in the rain --all dressed up in a dress and then getting all wet and windblown. ick.

Today would be a great day to just put on my "weight-challenged" pants (note: others may refer to this item as "fat pants") and laze around the house in front of the television or under a blanket with a good book.

But no. I HAVE to go to church. I'm on the Praise Team and we're already missing one person today because he has the nerve to be out of town. If I don't show up - that means it's just Dawna. She might miss me. Besides, I'm singing the special music for the offering. (yes, I sing too --whoever it was that asked...)

....What if Jesus had said, "oh, it feels like it's going to be a miserable day, they're going to falsely accuse me, beat me, humiliate me and crucify me. I think I'll just stay in bed with a papyrus scroll and read."

Okay...I'm going to get read for church!
Besides, you're not going to believe this --but out my window --this very moment --is a break in the clouds and I see a patch of blue sky with a tiny silver-lined white cloud trying to burst forth!

....behind every dark cloud...there is a silver lining...

Have a blessed day all!

upward...at last

the spiral
downward
into the space
where we hope never to go

we see others there
we pray
we hold out our hands
and pull them out

we help them stay away from the edge
we don't go too close
for we may fall into the abyss

but when no one's looking
we stray
we slip
we slide
we spiral downward
into the space
where we hoped never to go


why?
because we've lost our focus
we don't see the helping hand
we see the abyss
and it calls to us
to fall
to spiral
downward
into the space
where we hoped never to go

at last we get the strength
to reach for help
to search for a way
upward
up out of the space
where we hoped never to go


we take the hand that's offered
we clamor
we struggle
we climb
we somehow allow ourselves
to be helped

upward

up out of the space

where we hoped never to go

Half Full?

My dear husband has been working on this one mortgage deal (he's a broker) for quite some time.

Today, he found out that there is only one remaining option to get the deal done.

I'm thinking of all the failed attempts...and moaning because there's only one last option and thinking that it's probably not going to work and then where are we getting the money for the bills...yada yada blah blah blah.

No deal = no commission = no money.

Randy, on the other hand is still full of enthusiasm --"That's okay --I can get it done this way --this will still work...etc."

This is one of the reasons I fell in love with him. He rarely gets discouraged and rarely gives up. He always sees the proverbial glass as half full and I always see it as half empty (when it pertains to me). Amazingly, I can counsel anyone under the sun and encourage them to see the glass as half full! I just can't seem to apply that principle to my life. Why am I so pessimistic?

How do you see the glass?

Good Advice

I am notorious for forgetting things. Twice, in the past two weeks, I have missed appointments at my physician's office for my routine six-month blood draw to check important things like my cholesterol level and whether or not my liver is suffering damage because of the medications that I take. Somewhere, on some scrap of paper, I had recorded the appointment - but then quickly proceeded to misplace the scrap of paper –thus forgetting my appointment altogether.

Also, my schedule has just taken on some new responsibilities as my DH and I are enrolled in training courses in order for us to become foster parents. We have CPR/First Aid classes, Safety Management Training Classes, Information Meetings, etc. We also must get our well water tested and that can only occur on certain days because of when the laboratory is available. And then of course, there's all my church activities - worship practice, LifeGroup, Wednesday night Marriage Encounter, Sunday services...etc. Throw in the appointments to get my hair cut and Olivia's annual physician's visit, dentist and optometry visits and all the things on my husband’s schedule that he expects me to remember and I’m sunk!

Actually, compared to most people, my schedule is not very busy, however, I am finding it more and more difficult to keep track of all these appointments in my head - which is where I usually store my calendar of events. (Hence the missed blood draws!) I have admitted defeat and finally decided that my aging mind is no longer capable of storing all the appointments and things of which I need to be aware on a daily basis.

I remembered that somewhere in my desk I had stashed a lovely engagement calendar - spiral bound with a beautiful impressionistic painting of a vase of flowers -- compliments of The Old Farmer's Almanac. So, I rummaged around my desk until I found it. Ah –awesome! I proceeded to ‘copy’ all my appointments from my brain and all the little scraps of old envelopes and post-its scattered throughout the house upon which I had written down the appointments whenever I had scheduled them.

One of the nice things about this Farmer’s Almanac Engagement Calendar is that it has little facts, famous quotes, household and gardening tips, etc. splashed throughout the pages. Next to the space for today’s entry it reads:

“Never carry an ice cream cone in your back pocket.”
WOW! It’s a good thing that I’ve chosen to use this calendar because now the next time I try to put an ice cream cone in my back pocket I can refer to today’s calendar entry and REMEMBER not to do that!

Whew! What a relief!

Illustration Friday: Change

Chameleons Change C O L O R

This week’s theme is CHANGE. The possibilities are endless.
I chose to go with a reptile.

Sharpie Marker and Colored Pencil on Cardstock.

Opposites

Have any of you ever seen the television show, Wife Swap? It's a reality show where the wives in two families switch homes for two weeks. For the first week, they are required to live as the homeowning wife, following all the rules of the household. The second week, they are allowed to "mix things up" and ask the family to live by their rules. At times, it's total chaos and often makes for what the networks say is "good" television.

Usually, at the end of the swap period, both families have been able to glean some good from the experience. Taking with them new ideas to implement and improve their relationships with their families. Seeing that living life a little differently than they normally live may not be such a bad thing in the end.

I watched a recent episode where a SUPER organized, bin and label organizing Mom switched place with a Mom who lives her life as a pirate - literally --costume, attitude, etc. It was definitely a swap of women from two different worlds!

It was with horror and disbelief that I viewed the disarray of the home from whence the Pirate came. There were clothes on the bedroom floors - six inches thick - fleas all over the house - nothing in its place. The 'neat freak' super organized home had everything labeled and placed neatly in bins --even the FREEZER shelves were labeled as to where to put the vegetables as opposed to where to put the meat.

As you can imagine, both of these women were stepping WAY out of their comfort zone! The stress level between the "new" wives and their "new" families was at times, overwhelming!

I looked around at my home and decided that I'm somewhere in between (i.e. the clothes on the bedroom floor are only one or two inches thick and the freezer is organized, although not labeled, and we have no fleas...only an occasional housefly which sneaks in because someone leaves the door open too long while going in or out.

Then I started to think about our upcoming challenge of becoming foster parents. Undoubtedly, there will be kids coming into our home who will be way out of their comfort zone. I have no idea how we're going to "mix" together. Our attitudes, belief systems, habits and patterns of living will more than likely be very different. I'm thinking that there is potential for major stress on everyone's part. But I’m praying and trusting God that we will all benefit from the experience. Praying that I may learn not to be so ‘rigid’ and not to set my expectations too high and perhaps the children will learn some things that will help them to better their lives as well.

Lord, help me to "go with the flow"!

Turn on Your Speakers and Double Click the Arrow Below

Exhausted - OR Where's a Good Pizza Delivery Person When You Need Him?

Well - I decided to take advantage of this beautiful day - Sieze the Day, if you will and get some painting done which I started several weeks ago. Until today I haven't seemed to find the time (or else the weather was uncooperative). I've been working on painting the cinder block along the basement which is exposed. Originally it was "battleship gray". I've painted it green --to match the shutters. It looks SO much better! (click on photo for a larger view.)
The block wraps around the house, of course, and appears on three walls - all but the front which is at ground level. Most people would be able to accomplish this task in two days. One day per coat of paint. Not me. I have to do it in eight foot sections --take a break for a day and come back and do coat #2 on the first section and then paint another section.... It's this whacko disease that I have - MS. It totally zaps my energy. My goal is to have the block painting completed before the snow flies. I have one eight foot section which needs two coats and a 16 foot section on the other side of the house which needs a second coat.

The problem I'm facing now is that my husband will soon be home from a long and trying day at work and I don't have dinner prepared. I have no energy to stand in the kitchen and cook. It's just not happening. What was that you say? Order a pizza?! Ah - simple solution. Not. We live out in the "middle of nowhere" and there is no decent, respectable pizza place that will foot the gas bill to deliver a pizza way out here.


I think tonight's going to be a PB&J kinda night.

So...what good things are you eating for dinner? ....nevermind...I don't want to know!

21 Things For Which I'm Grateful

Lazy Sunday afternoons

Peach flavored iced tea

My favorite pair of comfortable jeans which even I won't wear in public

A freezer full of fabulous Rich Plan food!

Vanilla scented candles

The smell of fresh cut grass

Crisp Autumn evenings - just before dusk.

140 lb Cold Press Watercolor Paper (it's an artist thing)

My daughter's laughter

Black Raspberry Custard ice cream

Self-adhesive stamps

A husband who doesn't mind if the house isn't clean

A Harvest Moon

The smell of Crayola Crayons

A newly sharpened pencil

Shiny, new copper pennies

Antiques

The movie, The Sound of Music

The ability to sing

My memory foam bed and pillow

A handful of wildflowers picked just for me by our daughter

For what are you grateful?

READING is FUNDAMENTAL!

Open your Bible. Go ahead. Turn off the computer. Open God's Word. He has something AWESOME just for YOU today! Now go DO it! Then come back and tell me how awesome it was!!

My Response to Birmingham Girl

After reading Birmingham Girl's post today, I immediately thought of a recent collage I created.

My art speaks my feelings on the subject.

By the way, that is NOT supposed to be me reclining on the sofa --I'm definitely not the let-me-don-my-chiffon-and-luxuriously-lounge-on-the-sofa type! Give me a pair of sweat pants, a baggy T-shirt and my New Balance walking shoes and I'm happy!

My Disease

I have a disease.

I don’t know if it has a name. But I’ve chosen to name it “Biblio-Obsessivo-Purchioso Disease” or “BOPoD” for short.
Definition: An uncontrolled OBSESSION and love of BUYING massive amounts of books.

I’m sure that there must be a REAL word for the state of being completely obsessed with books – specifically OWNING books. Perhaps if Tina Fabulous were to look in the coveted Oxford Dictionary, she could find the word for me. But for now, Bopod will have to do.

Here’s the deal. I own a lot of books. I own so many books that I don’t know how many books I own. They are everywhere –literally in every room of our home. Downstairs there are at least four bookshelves stacked –double stacked –with books. “Double stacking” is the art of stacking books in a deep book shelf with one row against the back and another row in the front – thereby covering the books in the back so they’re no longer visible –making it impossible to know where a book is at any given moment because you just can’t see them.

Not only do I own too many books. I can’t stop buying books. Yesterday, our mailperson delivered a package from Ebay –a book I HAD to have because just two weeks ago Crossings Book Club (one of many book clubs of which I am a member) sent me two books (their member’s selections of the month) and one of them was a sequel. Oh no! I hadn’t read the first book in the series yet –better hurry and order the first book. After a thorough search online, I found the best deal on Ebay -only $1.00 (plus $4.07 s/h). A Bargain!! The book is in NEW condition. Had I purchased it elsewhere, I would have paid at least $12.00 for the book alone. Ha – I deserve a pat on the back for “smart” shopping!

I used to live in Pittsburgh and worked in the neighborhood of Oakland which is where the original, HUGE, Carnegie Library is located. The Carnegie Library houses more than 3.3 million volumes. THREE POINT THREE MILLION!! Amazing. Our little small-town library has slightly over forty thousand. You may understand why I complain every time I go into our little small-town library, with it’s antiquated card catalog and check-out system which doesn’t include computers to track books in house or those borrowed. But, I digress.

Also, in Pittsburgh, I lived in close proximity to several large bookstores –Borders, Barnes and Noble, Family Christian Stores, not to mention the dozens and dozens of independently owned bookstores and used bookstores. Where I live now, the closest Borders or Barnes and Noble is at least 50 miles away. (I’m not kidding.) I used to love to go into the bookstores and spend hours at a time just browzing. (This was before I was married and had a child – there is no time for such frivolity today!) To be around books more, I even worked at Barnes and Noble and Family Christian Stores –just for fun. My “real” job as a Medical Technologist at The University of Pittsburgh Medical Center was grand –but didn’t get me anywhere near books – although I did often volunteer to go to the medical library when we needed to do research on an uncommon disease or disease process. But again, I digress.

Today in the mail, I received two of many regular offers I receive on a daily basis inviting me to join another book club. I found myself perusing the pamphlets, drooling over the titles, planning which ones I can purchase with my “buy 6 books for only $2” deal. Then calculating how much money in shipping and handling fees I’d pay and figuring how much I’d have to spend to “fulfill” my commitment and deciding that if I withdraw my membership immediately upon fulfilling my membership commitment, I can save a WHOPPING $3. Or if I choose NOT to join the club –I can save even MORE because I will have never purchased anything in the first place. But then –I wouldn’t be feeding my addiction.

I forced myself to write down the titles that I’m interested in from the pamphlets so that I can take the list to the library and borrow the books instead of buying them. Of course since our library is small –I will most likely have to wait several weeks before the library will be able to locate the book from another library and have it sent via inter-library loan. In the meantime, I could’ve bought the book – had it shipped to my home – and have it read three times! See – this is WHY I own so many books. Our hometown library is just too small.

And did I mention that I haven’t read HALF of the books I own because I don’t have the time? Yet I just keep buying more! What’s up with that?!

Okay…I’m going to end this post and go read one of the four books which I borrowed from my friend Dawna.

I told you it was a disease.

Cheated

I’m sitting here watching a taped episode of The Oprah Show.

They are running a tape from 1989 when Oprah had the opportunity to be in the delivery room while two parents were anticipating the birth of their child.

I watched the surgeon scrub the mother’s belly.

I heard Oprah exclaim, “I see hair! I see hair!” as the baby was being removed from the womb.

I heard Oprah scream, “It’s a boy! It’s a boy!”

I saw the father cry as he bent down to kiss his wife.

I saw the nurse swaddle the baby and present him to the mother to hold while the doctor finished stitching her incision.

And I feel cheated.

I too, am a Mom.

I was looking forward to sharing all those moments when Olivia came into this world.

Looking forward to hearing someone exclaim, “It’s a girl! It’s a girl!”

Looking forward to crying tears of joy with my husband when she was born.

Looking forward to holding my newborn baby on my chest.

Olivia was born via emergency C-section 2 ½ months early. The last thing I remember after I kissed my husband and they wheeled me into the O.R and prepped me for surgery. was counting backwards from ten as they placed the anesthesia mask on my face.

I woke up in recovery –asking if the baby was okay and was it a boy or girl.

I was in such critical condition that I spent two days in the ICU and didn’t even get to see my daughter, who was fighting for her life, until she was three days old.

And then, when I finally was wheeled into the NICU and saw Olivia for the very first time, an insensitive nurse told me that it was almost time for “change of shift” and she was going to have to “give report” and I had to leave –after only seeing Olivia for not even five minutes.

It was over a week before I could hold her.

The whole experience still brings tears to my eyes over four years later.

Don’t think for one minute that I’m not eternally grateful for all the miracles that took place during Olivia’s first two months of life that she spent in the NICU before being released to come home. The Lord spared her life several times. He was faithful.

The experts told us that it would be six years before Olivia would “catch up” to her peers and they wanted to follow her progress every three months. At age 18 months, they looked at us and said, “We never want to see you again. Not only has Olivia caught up to her peers, but she has surpassed “normal” children her age, especially in the area of her communication skills.” Needless to say, we did the “happy dance” and praised God for His goodness.

Every time I know of a mother who has had the privilege of going through natural childbirth (though some may not consider it a privilege!), or hear of a mother who was able to be awake during her C-section—with her husband by her side…I am jealous.

Some people may tell me to “get over it –there are much worse things in this life to be sorry about.” And they would be right.

There are days when I wonder why God took us down that path.

I wonder why we went through all the anguish we went through during Olivia’s very difficult first two months of life.

Why He chose us to suffer in that way.

And then wonder, why not?

He has great plans for our daughter - this I know.

But, I still feel cheated.

The Drain

Here is a photo of my friends on a recent evangelistic mission trip to Africa.
They saw the mighty hand of God work wonders! So exciting!

There is something that is troubling me, however.

Note: One is standing in the Northern Hemisphere and one is standing in the Southern Hemisphere.

If each of them had a sink beside them and poured a glass of water down the drain, the sink in the Northern Hemisphere would drain counter-clockwise. The sink in the Southern Hemisphere would drain clockwise.

If there was a sink sitting EXACTLY on the equator…what direction would the water drain?

These are the things that I think about.

2,996; A Tribute to Glen J. Wall

A Tribute to Glen J. Wall – age 38 – Senior Vice President for Cantor Fitzgerald, World Trade Center. Glen was from Rumson, New Jersey - victim September 11, 2001

I didn’t know Glen.
I did not know him, but I want to honor him.

I look at the photo of Glen and try to imagine what kind of man he was. A husband and a father...one friend says, "Glenno" we miss you. Miss your sparkling eyes and smile. You had a great 38 years." Your pal Eagle. How many knew him? How many grieve his loss? How many remember?

Today, I grieve the loss of Glen J. Wall.
Although I didn’t know him, he represents the thousands of people who lost their lives on September 11th.
I offer a prayer for his loved ones – that they may be comforted. That they may feel the arms of America around them today, holding them.
May they feel a peace that surpasses all of their understanding. May they feel God's love today in a way they've never known before.
And may God bless them today and every day.

Glen, perhaps we’ll meet one day in Heaven. I would like that.

Today, I honor you, Glen J. Wall - and promise that I will always remember.

---

Meet Me In the Stairwell

You say you will never forget where you were when you heard the news on September 11, 2001? Neither will I.

I was on the 110th floor in a smoke-filled room with a man who called his wife to say "Goodbye." I held his fingers steady as he dialed. I gave him the peace to say, "Honey, I am not going to make it, but it is okay...I am ready to go."

I was with his wife when he called as she fed breakfast to their children. I held her up as she tried to understand his words and as she realized he wasn't coming home that night.

I was in the stairwell of the 23rd floor when a woman cried out to Me for help. "I have been knocking on the door of your heart for 50 years!" I said. "Of course I will show you the way home - only believe in Me now."

I was at the base of the building with the priest ministering to the injured and devastated souls. I took him home to tend to his flock in Heaven. He heard my voice and answered.

I was on all four of those planes, in every seat, with every prayer. I was with the crew as they were overtaken. I was in the very hearts of the believers there, comforting and assuring them that their faith has saved them.

I was in Texas, Kansas, London. I was standing next to you when you heard the terrible news. Did you sense Me?

I want you to know that I saw every face. I knew every name - though not all know Me. Some met Me for the first time on the 86th floor.

Some sought Me with their last breath.

Some couldn't hear Me calling to them through the smoke and flames; "Come to Me...this way...take my hand." Some chose, for the final time, to ignore Me. But, I was there.

I did not place you in the Tower that day. You may not know why, but I do. However, if you were there in that explosive moment in time, would you have reached for Me?

September 11, 2001 was not the end of the journey for you. But someday your journey will end. And I will be there for you as well. Seek Me now while I may be found. Then, at any moment, you know you are "ready to go."

I will be in the stairwell of your final moments.

Love, God

---

---

Click here for more tributes.

huh?

When a doctor himself needs doctoring so that another doctor doctors the doctor, does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor the doctor the way the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored or does the doctor doing the doctoring of the doctor being doctored doctor as he wants to doctor?

the short list

here's the short list of the things I don't like:

gasoline is $2.69 a gallon in my town --while just 77 miles away, in my sister's town it is $2.24 - what is up with that?

knowing that it's almost midnight and I have to get up early for church and I haven't yet taken a shower and shaved my legs

irreversible brain damage

boston creme donuts (I know, not cool)

driving at night on the interstate while it's raining

knowing that my daughter is growing up way too fast

mustard on hot dogs

too much whipped cream on pumpkin pie

dirt under my fingernails

when my 75 pound dog leans all over me after he's been in the pond

Good n'Plenty candy

ketchup that is NOT Heinz (if it's not Heinz --it's not TRUE ketchup)

people who go around sniffing all the time refusing to blow their nose

commercials

mosquitoes!!!!!

stepping in dog poo

earwax

The Right Thing

Did you ever know that you were doing the right thing. REALLY KNOW it?

I have a little story.....Several years ago, I had the honor of being part of an incredible worship team. Our worship pastor was gifted in playing the acoustic guitar and has written hundreds of songs and recorded several CDs. The Lord brought together all kinds of musicians ....a keyboardist, a flutist, a trumpet player, an awesome drummer and four incredible vocalists whose voices blended "just like the angels" (or so we were told). I loved being a part of that team.

However, there came a time during that period, when the Lord told me that I had to step down from my position because there were some things that He needed to "work" in me and I could not be in a position of leadership while He was doing the work. I resisted. But finally, after my pastor gave me a "gentle" nudge, I resigned from the team.

Several weeks later, I attended a Women's Aglow meeting and the speaker there prophesied over me --told me that she saw rivers of worship flowing from my belly and that I was created to worship. She said that the Lord was going to use me mightily in the area of worship. I was thrilled, yet broken in spirit, knowing that at that time, I had been removed from my position on the worship team by the Lord. The woman who prophesied over me had no idea that I could even sing, and she couldn't have possibly known of my deep desire to be involved with worship.

Several years went by. I married and moved to another town. When we began attending the church where we are now, I was sitting behind the pastor one Sunday morning and he turned around after worship and said to me. "You need to be up front." I looked at the "team" which was on the platform. The "team" consisted of one person, Jim. Jim did a great job at leading worship but you can imagine my disappointment when I knew that there would be a lot of "building" of our team --and that it was going to take a lot of time. Not to mention the fact that one of my biggest faults is always comparing things to other things. In my mind, this team could never measure up to the team that I had left behind at my other church.

After a year, I began to really get discouraged. Our team consisted of three vocalists. Period. No musicians. We sang all of our songs using accompaniment tracks and I believed that method was limiting the "flow" of the Holy Spirit. But, we had no choice. We had no musicians. Eventually, I dropped off the team.

Six months later, Dawna showed up. She has a beautiful voice. A few weeks later, her Aunt Janet approached me and said that Dawna would like for me to sing with the team but didn't feel she knew me well enough to talk to me about it. Janet and I spoke at length and by the end of the conversation, I was finally beginning to listen to the Holy Spirit as He was telling me that I needed to be on the team again. But still, made no move to volunteer. A few weeks later, my pastor actually said from the pulpit in a Wednesday service, "Deb, I'm going to say it...You need to be up here singing!" Okay Lord. I give.

The next week I showed up at worship practice. We still have only three vocalists. And we still sing using accompaniment tapes. But, the Lord is using us. There is not a week that goes by when someone doesn't come up to me after a service telling me what a blessing it is to them that I am singing again. Each week at practice, we pray that the Lord will increase our number and bring in musicians. Each week we pray that the people of our congregation will worship --truly worship.

We have developed a great friendship, the three of us - and our "sound guy", Dave, (Who just happens to be Dawna's husband.) I am grateful for the relationship we all have formed. Grateful for how the Lord has melded our hearts together. Grateful for what each of us brings to the team. We balance each other in our preferred styles of music and in our personalities. We go from “super organized – Pre-A” type (Dawna) to “way laid back ‘Z’ type” (Jim) to somewhere in between (me). And Dave, bless his heart, puts up with all of us!

All day today, a hymn was running through my head –and I sang it over and over again “…all that thrills my soul is Jesus…” I said to my husband before I left for worship practice that I was going to mention to Jim that we should sing that hymn sometime soon. When I got to practice, I couldn’t for the life of me, remember the song, but I said that there was a song that I had been singing all day and as soon as I could remember it, I would tell them. Then, I looked down at the page in the hymnal –one of the songs that we will be singing on Sunday…..you guessed it….”…all that thrills my soul is Jesus…”
Awesome. It’s incredible how the Lord had prepared my heart today and got me “on the same page” as our worship leader.

Dawna said, “Isn’t it neat how the Lord confirmed that you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing?!” Yes, it is. My prayer is that the Lord will grow our worship team –in His time –in His way. May we seek to lead the congregation in true worship –getting back to the heart of worship –worshipping in Spirit and in Truth. And may lives be changed for eternity through our ministry.

One more thing....It is really because of Janet that I am singing on the team. Janet has since gone Home to be with the Lord. I am thankful for Janet's gentle nudge --and look forward to worshipping by her side when I join her one day in that Glorious Place that the Lord has prepared for those who love Him!

It's a post already!

okay --no time because we have to leave for church in two minutes.

a few things...Margie don't feel guilty because I DO think that Sara stole her post idea from me --but you'll never hear me SAY that!!

second....Cheryl --email me about Ebay

Dawna ---see you in a few! --I'll get posting soon-- promise

and yes, to all who inquired --a mini getaway vacation at the inlaws in New York.
Fun time.

gotta run!
more later!

Random Things

Some Random Things About Me:

One of my favorite breakfasts is oatmeal with raisins, but I only eat it about once a month.

I have at least fifty collapsed Priority Mail Boxes in my garage –just in case I need to send a Priority Mail Package. (Actually, it’s fallout from my Ebay powerseller days.)

Oh…I was once an Ebay Powerseller.

Stamps. I love them. I buy them by the dozens –and always a large variety.

I talk to myself –all the time.

I enjoy watching dust float around when the sun shines through a window. Then I think about how we breathe in all that dust and pretty much get grossed out.

One thing I want to do before I die is ride in a hot air balloon.

I hate weeding flower beds and prefer to let things grow wild. Every weed is a wildflower waiting to bloom.

I am not a sports fan, however, if I must, I will RUSH through worship practice so that our sound guy can RUSH home in time for the Steelers’ kickoff. (Have I told you recently how much I appreciate you Dave?!)

My favorite fruit is a nectarine.

I am allergic to cats.

Books. I own hundreds. Enough to start my own library, I think. But I still keep buying them and borrowing them from the library and from friends. It’s a disease.

Wow Wow Wubbzy is Olivia’s new favorite show. Oh wait, that’s a random thought about her, not me. Strike that from the record.

Art – my passion – followed closely by singing, my second passion.

I once painted “Damas” and “Caballeros” on the bathroom doors of a small school in the Dominican Republic.

I love all food –with the exception of liver and onions.

I love to cut the grass –as long as I can use the zero-turn riding mower.

The zero-turn riding mower is currently stuck in the mud –no grass cutting today.

I don’t do diet pop or diet anything. If Im going to all the trouble of eating it –it’s going to be REAL.

I enjoy blogging as a creative outlet.

I trade Artist Trading Cards with artists from all over the world.

I regret that I didn’t take piano lessons longer when I was a child and I plan on allowing my daughter to learn piano (if she wants to) so that I can “live vicariously” through her playing.

My first piano recital piece was The Happy Sailor –I can still hum the tune.

One of the meanest things I’ve ever done was once putting chocolate ex-lax in my college roommate’s chocolate jello dessert. I feel badly about it to this day.

I use the term “loser” way too often, especially in reference to my pastor –who is NOT a loser (most of the time!) (Pastor Bill –luv ya man!)

I don’t have a favorite color ---it all depends upon my mood at the time.

I do have a favorite number. It is the number 4.

My favorite punchline to my favorite joke is: “only when pancakes grow on doghouses in July.”

I love my husband –with all my heart.

Are You Ready?

A friend sent me this video. I think it's one of the most powerful videos produced regarding the rapture of the church --the time when the Lord returns to take to Heaven all of those who have accepted Him as Lord and Savior of their lives. If you're not sure you're ready for this event, if you think you may be one of the ones left behind, I encourage you to pray and ask Jesus to be Lord of your life. You may click here to read more.

Please --don't put this off. It is the most important decision you will EVER make in your life!

Another of Olivia's Antics

Literally 40 minutes before we had to be out the door to go to church, Olivia came running up the stairs after playing in Daddy's office...Laughing...."MOMMY! MOMMY! LOOK! This is WAY funny, isn't it?! I turned my arm blue!!"

Yes, Olivia...waayyyyy funny....

By the way...there is no soap on this planet that will remove Sharpie Permanent Marker from the arm of a four-year old!

School Days

I thought it might be fun during this "back to school" season, to enjoy some school humor. Following are actual sentences from essays written by our nation's high school students. Geniuses --every one??

Enjoy!

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse, without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work .

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

One Word

It’s interesting how one word can make all the difference in the world. I read a testimony today about someone’s weight loss journey. It was worded this way: “She has released over thirty pounds and has a goal of releasing an additional twenty to thirty pounds.”

Most of us, when we want to shed pounds, talk in terms of “losing” weight. I began to think about the term “release” in relation to weight. Here are my thoughts: The dictionary definition of “lose” is “to come to be without (something in one's possession or care).” If we think about something that we’ve lost –an object or some money or a favorite item –we usually spend a considerable amount of time and energy searching to find it again.

The dictionary definition of “release” is “to free from confinement, bondage, obligation, pain, etc.; let go. Liberation from anything that restrains or fastens.” Aha! I think I’m going to choose to RELEASE weight rather than lose it! Releasing it means that I’m FREE from the bondage and pain which I carry with me when I carry the extra weight! There’s a whole new set of emotions that go with “releasing” weight!

Something to think about huh?

His Plans

Jeremiah 29:11 is a popular verse from the Bible. It is emblazoned on refrigerator magnets and wallhangings. It's often printed on the front of church bulletins. I have it sewn into a throw which sits on the back of our sofa. Because of that, I read it several times a day. This morning, in my Bible study, this verse came up. My study said to read the verse and replace "you" with my name and then pray for a new revelation as to what God may be saying to me. So I did.

The Amplified Bible says this: (I've inserted my name where appropriate)

For I know the thoughts and plans
that I have for you, Deb, says the Lord,
thoughts and plans for welfare and peace
and not for evil to give you, Deb,
hope in your final outcome.
- Jeremiah 29:11

As I prayed, the Lord so clearly spoke to me... As a parent, I have so many thoughts and plans for Olivia. Obviously, I want what is best for her. I have a lot of grandiose ideas of what she may grow up to be and how she will be successful as she grows. However, I'm not the one who is going to be making the choices for my daughter. Olivia will make her own choices about her life. Certainly, I pray that she looks to the Lord and to her father and I for guidance - but she will make the ultimate decisions when she is old enough to do so. My desire is for her to make the BEST choices so that she will prosper in all areas of her life.

That is no different than my relationship with my Heavenly Father. Just as my Heavenly Father has thoughts and plans for me, I will not prosper, and in fact, may do harm to myself physically, emotionally, or spiritually based on the choices that I make each day. I need to make the right choices. The right choices in my thinking, my speaking and my actions.

The right choices in my eating. As I struggle with my weight, I will never win this battle if I don't choose carefully. Choosing to eat only when I'm physically hungry - and then choosing healthy foods.

Father, I thank You for this new revelation regarding Your Word today and ask for Your help in making right choices. May every morsel of food that I ingest today be to sustain my life and not to feed my fleshly desire to eat for the sake of eating because the food is good - or it's my favorite snack - or I'm bored - or sad - or happy - or celebrating - or whatever other excuse I come up with for eating when I'm not physically hungry. I trust You for Your help as today I choose to die to self in the area of food. Thank You for trusting me to make right choices -- and providing the guidance I need to do so. I pray these things in Jesus' name, Amen.

New BLOG Alert!

Everyone! Please welcome my friend Dawna to Blogland! Go visit her
blog and tell her that I sent you! She more than likely has read your blog --she's been "lurking" for months!!

For Janet

In Loving Memory of my friend, Janet
who went Home to be with Jesus earlier today,
August 25, 2006

She suffers no longer
She's dancing with Jesus

Janet, we will miss you
But look forward to the day
When we meet again
In that Glorious Place
Worshipping our Savior together
For all of eternity!

A Song for Janet

Chocolate --the New Health Food

Okay –here’s what I know.
I love chocolate.
Since I love chocolate, I’m assuming that God created me to love chocolate.
Therefore, chocolate must be good for me.
Sounds reasonable to me...

A study at the University of California has found eating chocolate increases levels of several classes of flavanoid which are thought to protect blood vessels. Matched molecule for molecule, chocolate flavanoids are more powerful than vitamins such as ascorbic acid in limiting the oxidation of LDL-cholesterol (that's the BAD cholesterol). Arteriosclerosis studies have suggested that oxidation of these lipoproteins is an essential step in the creation of artery-clogging plaque and therefore (here's the best part) chocolate can prevent arteries clogging up!

Cocoa also contains a wealth of phytochemicals and polyphenols which have significant antioxidant properties and may help to reduce the risk of developing cancer and heart disease.

In fact, tests have shown that cocoa powder has equivalent or greater antioxidant activities than many fruit and vegetables and even red wine. A 40-gram serving of dark chocolate typically contains around 800 milligrams of antioxidants, about twice the quantity in a glass of red wine.

If you love me and want to help me maintain a healthy heart....send me bags of Hershey's Dark Chocolate Kisses!

Bring on the Chocolate!!!

Today's Theme: WORDS

There is a recurring theme on the blogs today --WORDS.

I just read a friend’s blog where she took some time to state that she is going to be a "motivational speaker" --and speak positive things.

I say BRAVO!

This morning, I received a telephone call from our church prayer chain asking me to pray for a woman who was said to be "going downhill fast". I prayed --and I called others on the chain to pray. I listened to others pray "whatever happens, let God's will be done"....now, there's nothing wrong with praying in alignment with God's will. In fact, that's exactly how God instructs us to pray. The problem came about when everyone sort of had this attitude of 'oh well, she's doing badly so we might as well give up and give in'. I say HOGWASH! This woman had expressed to me several weeks ago that she wants to get better so that she can be busy doing God's work. Well, guess what? Satan doesn't want her doing God's work. He is going to do all he can to prevent that from happening --including causing her to "go downhill fast".

I believe as Christians that we have the RIGHT to pray with AUTHORITY! To speak LIFE - to speak POSITIVELY. To command the enemy to leave!! To bind up any negative thoughts and speech --to take them captive. God's Word tells us that Jesus paid the price for our healing. Okay! Let's grab ahold of that and pray accordingly!

Now, I also realize that there are times when we have all the faith in the world and we pray and the outcome is different from what we expect. I don't have the answers. I don't know why young people die from injuries in ATV accidents. I don't know why children suffer with cancer. But I do know that as a Christian, it is my duty and responsibility to speak positively and continue to trust that God knows best because He sees the big picture.

Hebrews, chapter 11 speaks of faith --in faith, by faith, through faith - Abraham, Moses, Enoch...in faith, by faith, through faith...and then at the end of the chapter it says, what more can I say? In other words, are you 'getting it'?! By Faith. The Bible says: The just shall live by his faith. (Habakkuk 2:4) The Lord has given us all a measure of faith --His Word says that He has done that. Pray that your faith will increase!

My friend says that she has a lot of power --power to SPEAK life - to speak words of encouragement --to speak positively. We have the power of life and death in our tongues. (Proverbs 18:21). Let's SPEAK LIFE!!

And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. --James 5:15

And I will take sickness away from the midst of you. --Exodus 23:25

Beyond the Veil - The Holy of Holies

Beyond the Veil - The Holy of Holies, originally uploaded by beyondhope.

Many of you have requested to see more of my art. Recently, I read someone's blog post regarding The Holy of Holies. It prompted me to take a photograph of this painting which I did as the cover art for a worship CD entitled, Beyond the Veil.

We are so privileged as Christians. God's Word tells us that the moment Jesus died at Calvary, the veil of the temple was torn in two. The temple veil was a large, very thick (8 inches thick, I believe) fabric which separated the place where the common people were allowed to be and the place where only once a year the priest went into the Holy of Holies to offer a sacrifice to God for the atonement of the peoples' sin.

When Jesus died, the torn veil was a sign from the Lord that now anyone could approach His throne --not just the priest. Jesus became the ultimate sacrifice for our sins. No other sacrifice is necessary. Because of the great price He paid with His life, we all, as Christians, have the privilege, honor and authority to come to the Lord with our offerings of praise and thanksgiving and our petitions and requests. God hears us all --no matter our social or economic status --no matter our position in the church --no matter our age or our race. He looks beyond our background and our 'baggage'. He hears us. When we come to Him with a humble heart of repentence and offer Him our hearts, He hears us. When we ask Him to be the Lord of our life, he saves us from a life of devastation and lifts us to a place of honor. In His eyes we are considered a "royal priesthood". We are washed clean before Him. He doesn't see our sin. He doesn't see our mistakes. He doesn't see our failure. He sees us with pure hearts --white as snow --clean. Just as if we had never sinned.

God is awesome, isn't He?

Why not spend a few moments today in His presence--In the Holy of Holies? Thank Him for all He has done. Give Him praise for all the countless blessings He gives. Honor Him with your presence. He desires more than anything that you spend time with Him. Don't miss out on something that will be life-changing...because every time we spend time in His presence, we are changed for eternity!

Prayers for Rebekah

Attention all Christians!

Rebekah needs our prayer!

You may read all the details on her blog

As Christians, we are called to be overcomers. We don't need to allow Satan, or the circumstances of life to keep us from God's amazing promises. In His Word, God says that Jesus paid the price for our healing. Won't you stand in agreement with me today, on behalf of Rebekah - believing for a miracle --praying with authority --knowing that God is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all that we can ask or think?!!! Several weeks ago, Rebekah's scans were "clear". I believe that it is the Lord's intention that they remain CLEAR! Pray Warriors Pray!!

Random Thoughts --and Art

Since my blog is titled: "Deb's Random Thoughts...and ART!", I thought I'd blog some of my random thoughts (and Art!). (whacko blogger problems won't allow me to post more than one photo---so check back for edits later!)

Random thought #1: This morning in church a gentleman sang a song about eternity - and how he was going to be sitting at the feet of Jesus....the lyrics said not to look for him by the walls of jasper or on the streets of gold, but to look for him at Jesus' feet. Here's what I'm thinking... Jesus must have some pretty big feet! I mean, think about it, every Christian that I know wants to sit at Jesus' feet when they get to heaven. How is that going to happen? What if everyone wants a turn at the same time? There are going to be MILLIONS of Christians in heaven. Will we have to take a number like we do at the Stuff-Mart Deli? I hope not, because today, after church, we stopped at Stuff-Mart and went to the deli, and took a number. Guess what?! The deli worker lady skipped my number?! What is up with that? We had to wait until the next deli worker lady called the next number and tell her that we had a number that should have been called two numbers ago.... When I get to heaven, I don't want to wait to sit at Jesus' feet. And I'm thinking that since His Word says that He will give us the desires of our heart...He must be gonna have some big feet --enough for LOTS and LOTS of people to sit around!

Random Thought #2: Today at Stuff-Mart, I bought some ORANGE Cauliflower. On the plastic surrounding this odd-looking vegetable, are the words, "Contains 25% more Vitamin A than regular Cauliflower - same great taste!". So, how do they make it orange? Is Vitamin A orange...and they just water the plants with vast amounts of liquid vitamin A? You remember how when you were a kid and you put food coloring in some water and then stuck a stalk of celery in the water and it turned red or blue or whatever color you had put in the water? White Carnations will do the same thing. So...is that how they get Orange Cauliflower?

Random Thought #3: If I capture bugs and take them outside my house and release them (instead of killing them), does that make me a monk? Someone asked me this morning if I was a monk because I trap bugs and take them outside and release them. I said, "no, I just don't want squished bug guts all over my walls."

Random Thought #4: On a more serious note... I am grateful for Christian friends. Those who will pray with you and lift you before the throne of grace --when you don't have the energy or the will to pray for yourself. God is good. And I am blessed --with friends who love and care about me.

Random Thought (and Art) #5: Do you think this woman SHOULD be wearing a two-piece bathing suit to the beach? And what is up with that bathing cap?!!